


Happy Feast of Winter Veil

by Chash



Series: And So It Goes [5]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-05
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-28 12:25:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10100744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chash/pseuds/Chash
Summary: Nate is obviously glad that Bellamy and Clarke got back together, but it's hard to not compare his relationship with Monty to the two of them. Which is unfair to everyone, because Bellamy and Clarke are ridiculous, and he and Monty are functional. Everything's fine.He just needs to convince his brain of that.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Charity fic for [astairelover](http://astairelover.tumblr.com/)!

Nate doesn't think of himself as a competitive person, but he knows he has the capability within himself. He's not _always_ competitive, but sometimes it just crops up, and he tries to be careful, to rein it in when it's going to be anything other than fun. Having a silly rivalry with Bellamy is one thing; being genuinely invested in a low-stakes Magic tournament and fucking salty about his losses is another.

But whatever he feels about Bellamy and Clarke's relationship is a third, totally different thing. Because, of course, he's _happy_ for them. Incredibly happy. Unreal happy. He's thrilled beyond words that they found their way back together and worked it out, because no one has ever made Bellamy as happy as Clarke did, and he loves Bellamy and all he's ever wanted was for Bellamy to feel as good as he did when he was dating Clarke again. And now he does.

But their shit started within, like, _two weeks_ of Nate and Monty starting to date, even if it took them another six months to actually get it together, so Nate can't help feeling a little like they're in some sort of relationship arms race which he and Monty are always destined to lose, because they're simultaneously two weeks ahead and eight years behind. And that is an incredibly weird place to be.

Especially because, honestly, it's not like Bellamy and Clarke have been _together_ for eight years. They only knew each other for a few months the first time they met, and then six more after. It's less than a year of acquaintance, when all is said and done. It's got to be weird. It's not comparable to Nate and Monty. It's not comparable to _anything_ , Nate figures.

"It's like _Independence Day_ ," Bellamy tells him, two weeks after he and Clarke get back together, when Nate asks about it. They're having a roommate night, which means drinking and watching Netflix and trying not to text their significant others too often. It's nice. "Or, well, the _opposite_ of _Independence Day_."

"I have so many questions," says Nate.

Bellamy waves his hand vaguely. "I saw that when it came out, so, I was, like, eight. And I thought it was the coolest movie I'd ever seen. I _loved_ it. You remember we watched it like fifteen times in third grade?"

"Yeah, you wouldn't shut up about it."

"Yeah, well, I watched it again in college. And it wasn't _bad_ or anything. But it wasn't the same. And Clarke's--exactly the opposite of that. I thought she was great the first time we went out, and then I met her again, and--I didn't have a clue. She's not just as good as I thought she was, she's fucking _better_."

Nate rolls his eyes, but he knows it comes off as fond. "Have you told your girlfriend she's the opposite of _Independence Day_ yet? Did you film her reaction?"

"It's a compliment."

"I dunno, I'm kind of disappointed you don't still love _Independence Day_."

"I don't _dislike_ it," he protests. "Just didn't age as well as I thought."

"And Clarke did."

As always, his grin when he ducks his head is basically ridiculous, and Nate can't get upset.

"So much better than I thought."

Weird as the explanation is, it does make sense to Nate, which is probably one of the reasons Bellamy is his best friend. They get each other.

But it's hard to not feel a little ordinary, by comparison. And that's a stupid feeling for a lot of reasons, including his and Monty's genuinely weird meet-cute and how fucking _shitty_ Bellamy felt after the Clarke thing. Sure, estranged lovers coming back together is romantic in theory, but Nate would rather keep Monty to begin with than go through what Bellamy and Clarke did.

What Nate envies, in Bellamy, and by extension Clarke, is _certainty_. Bellamy knows he's going to spend the rest of his life with Clarke, because he knows what his life looks like without Clarke, and he never wants that. And it's not like Nate wants to find out what his life looks like without Monty. Monty is fucking amazing. But Bellamy and Clarke are--well, they're ahead. If anyone is keeping score.

Which is why it's so weird when Nate finds he's in a position to start thinking about cohabitation, and it doesn't seem to be on Bellamy's radar at all. Their leases with Roan are pretty informal and nebulous, because Roan doesn't actually care when they move in or out, but he does like having legal protection, probably because he for some reason decided to rent to _Murphy_. So they're getting to lease renewals at the start of December, and Nate had kind of expected to hear something from Bellamy about potentially moving in with Clarke. But if he's thinking about it, he hasn't brought it up, and Bellamy's usually good at talking through these things.

Maybe he's just talking with Clarke. It wouldn't be the worst thing, but--it feels a little lonely.

So he gets a six pack and waits until they're both two beers in to ask, "So, are you renewing your lease?"

"Does it ever worry you that you think you have to get drunk to talk about stuff with me? I care about your feelings all the time, Miller. You don't need to ply me with alcohol."

Nate scowls at his mostly empty bottle. "Who says I'm having feelings?"

"The beers are your tell."

"I figured you'd want to move in with Clarke."

"At some point, yeah," he says, easy. "But her lease isn't up until March, so I figure we can wait a couple more months to figure it out. It's not like I don't see her all the time anyway."

Bellamy and Clarke spend at least five nights a week sleeping in the same bed, with their longest unbroken streak of it coming in at, by Nate's count, thirty-seven days, over the summer when Bellamy wasn't yet drowning under a pile of grading. And, again, Nate knows it's not a competition. He knows the fact that he and Monty usually just do a few nights a week together is not a sign that their relationship is inferior, or dying, or _anything_. Their priorities are different. Nate is _happy_.

But still. He can't not know that.

Bellamy nudges his shoulder. "You want to move in with Monty?"

"It's too soon," says Nate.

"Fuck that, it's been almost a year, right? Have you talked to him?"

"Have I mentioned I hate functional, happy relationship Bellamy?" he grumbles.

"Yeah, but you never sell it. Seriously, if you want to move in with him, talk to him about it. You guys have known each other for almost a year, right? That's plenty of time. And if it doesn't work out, you can always live on my floor."

"Dude, your couch. If I lived on your floor, I'd have to overhear you and Clarke having sex."

"You already overhear that."

"That's the real reason I want to move out," he agrees. "Just so I won't have to hear you guys anymore."

"Sure. Definitely not that you love your boyfriend and want to move in with him."

"Definitely not that."

Bellamy drains his beer and goes and grabs them two more. "Just talk to him," he says again, like he didn't spend five months failing to communicate with Clarke. "If he doesn't want to, he'll say no. No big deal, right?"

"Yeah."

He means it, too; he knows it isn't a big deal. Like Bellamy said, if Monty's not interested, he'll just say no. It's not going destroy their relationship.

But if Monty says no, Nate will _know_ that. He'll have to live with the fact that Monty didn't want to get a place together, and even if it will be for completely legitimate reasons, it'll still kind of suck.

Then again, if Monty does want to move in together, he wants to know that too. So, Bellamy is right, and Nate is being an idiot. It's a reversal of their usual dynamic, and Nate's not thrilled about it.

So his only option is to shape up.

 **Me** : apparently bellamy and clarke aren't planning to move in together yet

 **Monty** : thanks for the update  
that kept me up at night

 **Me** : it kept ME up at night  
not because I had to listen to them having sex  
I'm trying to do that thing you do where you talk around what you want to say by talking about something else instead

 **Monty** : well I have no idea what's happening  
so you're doing a good job  
what's up?

 **Me** : I thought bellamy would want to move in with clarke and then I'd have an excuse to talk to you about moving in together  
but apparently he's not worrying about it until her lease is up

 **Monty** : that is kind of surprising, yeah  
but I guess they don't need it like we do

 **Me** : what?

 **Monty** : I didn't mean it in a bad way  
we're just kind of lazy introverts  
it's not like we need to be together to both be playing video games, so sometimes we are and sometimes we're not  
it'd be a lot easier if we just lived in the same place  
so we were playing video games together all the time  
sorry, was that weird?

 **Me** : depends  
do you not like being lazy introverts?

 **Monty** : we met playing hearthstone  
I knew what I was getting into  
I was into it  
I like my space  
but I'd like it more if my space was your space too  
I even came up with a plan

 **Me** : what kind of plan?

 **Monty** : well, it involved Clarke and Bellamy deciding to move in together too

 **Me** : that's a lot of plan

 **Monty** : I'm v cunning  
anyway  
Clarke's lease isn't up until like March  
me and Jasper's isn't up until June  
but you and Bellamy have rooms!  
in a nice house where Jasper and Raven know everyone!  
on the blue line!  
we have the correct number of rooms AND nice apartments, we're just in the wrong configuration  
so  
you switch with Jasper  
Raven switches with Bellamy  
no one has to overhear anyone else having sex  
well  
I guess Jasper and Raven still could overhear each other  
but your walls are basically fine so 

**Me** : you know we could just do that with Jasper even if Bellamy and Clarke don't want to move in together, right?  
they aren't actually needed for that plan

 **Monty** : I guess not  
that's just how I always pictured it I guess  
it's neater

 **Me** : I'm glad you were thinking about it  
I thought it might be too soon to ask

 **Monty** : oh, yeah, I was kind of worried about that too  
I didn't know how to bring it up either  
so thanks!!  
saved me the trouble

 **Me** : so what I'm hearing is you want me to move in with you

 **Monty** : we probably need to work out a few more details  
but that's basically what I'm telling you, yeah

Bellamy and Clarke are in the upstairs living room playing video games, and Nate just goes in, drops onto the couch next to Bellamy, and puts his head in Bellamy's lap. There's a second's pause, and then Bellamy starts petting him.

"You okay?" he asks.

"Great. Monty wants me to move in with him."

"Yeah? Awesome." Another pause, and Bellamy adds, "So, why are you lying on me?"

"You're very comfortable," Clarke says. "I don't blame him."

"My lap is the place to be. Seriously, are you happy? I'm happy. I assume everyone's happy."

"I'm definitely happy," says Clarke, but then adds, "Monty's been kind of stressing."

Nate rolls over so he can look at her, wary. "What did he tell you?"

"If you're asking if he showed me all his unnecessarily complicated diagrams of how Raven could take Bellamy's room and Jasper could take your room and all of the housing would work out perfectly, then yes, he did. I told him he should just talk to you and not try to make a whole presentation for the group."

"Wow, what a great idea," Bellamy says. "Can't believe no one told you that, Miller."

"Shut up." He sits up, staring up at the ceiling. "I've never lived with anyone I was dating before. And I know you guys haven't either. And Monty hasn't. Jesus, no one I know has helpful life experience."

"Yeah, but that shouldn't be news," says Bellamy. "You want to, right?"

"Obviously."

"And you love him, and you guys are in good shape. Seriously, why wait? If it's going to go wrong, you might as well find out now. It's serious enough you want to move in. Putting that off isn't going to make it easier if it doesn't work out."

"This from the guy who spent seven years failing to get over a bad breakup," Nate grumbles.

"Well, it worked out," Bellamy says. "Seriously, if the worst thing that's going to happen is the two of you not breaking up, you can't avoid that by not moving the relationship forward."

"Bellamy loves you and wants you to be happy," Clarke supplies.

"Yeah, that too."

"And you guys aren't doing the sublet thing with Raven?" he asks. 

"I might mention it to her," Clarke says. "I don't want her to feel like she has to. And if she wants to, it's not like there's a big rush. Roan doesn't care. Which doesn't mean you and Monty shouldn't do it!" she adds, quick, and Nate has to hide his smile. "You guys want to live together, so you should. It really is that simple."

"Seriously, for two people who were fucked up about their high-school exes for almost ten years, you guys give a lot of advice."

"The best way to learn is fucking up," Clarke says, as Bellamy protests, "Fuck you, I was twenty."

"Not a good argument," Nate says. "You think Jasper wants to move here?"

"He's kind of scared of Roan," Clarke muses. "But he also really wants Roan to think he's cool, so--yeah, I like your odds."

It's still a little overwhelming; Nate's twenty-eight and still doesn't really feel like he's enough of an adult to do things like have a retirement fund and move in with a significant other, for all he knows neither is that big a deal. He has college friends who seem to basically get in relationships to avoid homelessness, and ones who are married with children. In the grand scheme of things, this is a logical step.

"It's pretty cool, right?" he finally asks.

Bellamy hooks his arm around his neck for half a hug. "Pretty cool, yeah."

Despite the multiple reassurances, Nate is still, well, himself, so he doesn't feel really _settled_ about the decision. He and Monty have had plenty of important conversations exclusively online, but this one feels like it should cover all media. He wants to see Monty's face.

Plus, knowing his friends, Bellamy or Clarke probably told Monty he was being weird. So he might as well own it.

Jasper is staying at Maya's on Friday night, and Nate can't help thinking of it like a test run, for all they've done this plenty of times and it's actually completely normal. They hang out at Monty's apartment at least twice a month without Jasper, and maybe Monty has a point, because while Nate loves _him_ , he always feels less comfortable there than he does when they hang out at his place.

Nate likes his space, and Monty does too, so it really does make the most sense, to just have the same space.

"Did you talk to Jasper yet?" he asks. They're attempting to cook dinner together, because neither of them is a very good cook and both of them want to be better. Bellamy has been writing them easy, idiot-proof recipes to try out, and Nate has to admit he's pretty good at it. He should definitely put them all in a book or something.

"Not yet. I thought we should figure out more details first."

"What details are there?"

"I want a cat."

It's not the detail Nate was expecting. "A cat?"

"Yeah. Our lease lets us have a small pet, but I'd feel bad with a dog. Cats don't mind being cooped up all day as much. And I like cats. But Jasper didn't want a pet, so--what do you think?"

"A cat?"

"You already said that." He smiles. "It'll be my cat, you don't have to take care of it. But I was hoping you liked cats."

"Yeah," says Nate, but then has to add, "In theory. I've never had a cat." 

"I know. It's not a deal-breaker or anything. I just figured I should mention it."

"It's a big step."

"Yeah. They're all big steps. I'm not worried."

"Fuck you," he says, reflexively, and Monty grins. "Seriously, I can't stop worrying."

"I know. That's why I'm not worried." He leans against the counter, still smiling. "My college girlfriend didn't want to get serious with me. We dated senior year and I was still amazed another human was actually into me, so I didn't notice for a while. But when I said something about after graduation, she'd just get weird. That sucked. This is great."

"That anecdote didn't work for me."

"She didn't like me enough to figure out how to stay together after graduation. She didn't want the big steps at all. You're worried that if we move too quickly, it's going to go wrong, and we'll break up. You like me so much you're worried about liking me too much. It's fucking _awesome_."

Nate lets out a surprised bark of laughter. "I guess, yeah."

"Seriously, you're not sure want to move in now because it might be too soon, but--you want to move in with me. All of this is good, Nate."

He thinks it over for a long minute and finds he has absolutely no counterargument. This is them. This is where they are. They're good. "Do you have a cat in mind?" he finally asks, and Monty grins and kisses him.

"I think we can find one."

*

It feels like the most efficient move of Nate's life. There's something weirdly satisfying about literally trading places with someone. They rent a U-Haul for the day, and he and Bellamy pack all of his stuff into it, drive to Monty's, unload his stuff into Jasper's empty room, and get all of Jasper's stuff into the truck. Bellamy drives the two of them back and he and Jasper handle the unloading there, and Nate and Monty are left alone in their new apartment.

"I think we should have sex and get a cat and then you unpack," Monty says, into the slightly awkward silence of a huge life change. "I found a shelter in Arlington and already filled out the adoption form, so we can just drive over and see if any of the cats seem like a good fit."

Nate laughs and pulls him in for a long kiss. "Shit, I love you."

"Yup," Monty agrees. "That's why we're doing this."

And he's right; for all Nate's stressing, that's exactly why.


End file.
